Fr. Gilbert Choondal, SDB –
(Drawn from the Post Synodal Apostolic Exhortation, Amoris Laetitia, of Pope Francis)
1. Family Prayer: Set aside a few moments to be together as a family to pray. This is a sacred time for that family. If any member of the family is out of station, let him/her be united to the family in prayer wherever he/she is. “The family that prays together stays together…Moments of family prayer and acts of devotion can be more powerful for evangelization than any catechism class or sermon (Pope Francis, Amoris Laetitia, 227, 288).”
2. Cell-off Hour: Have a gadget-free hour in the family at least once a week in order to spend quality time together. Cell phones can be in silent or airport mode. “The media cannot replace the need for a more personal and direct dialogue, which requires physical presence or at least hearing the voice of the other person. We know that at times the media can keep people apart, as it happens, for example, if at dinnertime everyone is surfing on a mobile phone (Amoris Laetitia, 278).”
3. Family Etiquette: Learn to be sincere, gentle and polite with each other both in word and deed. Remember that your words can heal or hurt people.“In the family, “three words need to be used. I want to repeat this! Three words: ‘Please’, ‘Thank you’, ‘Sorry’. Three essential words! (Amoris Laetitia, 133.)”
4. Moral Formation: Parents have to observe, accompany and educate their children as regards their moral life. Parents need to educate them on the responsible use of the media, especially the social media. “Parents need to consider what they want their children to be exposed to, and this necessarily means being concerned about who is providing their entertainment, who is entering their rooms through television and electronic devices, and with whom they are spending their free time. Only if we devote time to our children, speaking of important things with simplicity and concern, and finding healthy ways for them to spend their time, will we be able to shield them from harm (Amoris Laetitia, 260).”
5. Catechesis: Parents are the first educators of faith to their children. They have to teach their children to pray. Among these, the role of the mother is the most significant. She is the first one to introduce the child to the rudiments of faith. Teach your children to make the Sign of the Cross, to pray during various moments of the day, and to revere and respect sacred images. “Mothers often communicate the deepest meaning of religious practice in the first prayers and acts of devotion that their children learn… Without mothers, not only would there be no new faithful, but the faith itself would lose a good part of its simple and profound warmth (Amoris Laetitia, 174).”
6. Sacred Space: Allot a space in the family for sacred articles like sacred images, the Bible, the rosary etc. This space is to be revered with the utmost devotion and sacrality. This space invites members of the family to raise their hearts to God at various moments of the day.“A family’s living space could turn into a Domestic Church, a setting for the Eucharist, the presence of Christ seated at its table (Amoris Laetitia, 15).”
7. Domestic Church: A family is a mini Church where there is the celebration of sacraments, life, love and prayer. Let family together participate in the Sunday Mass at the parish church. Let the whole family regularly participate in the Sacrament of Reconciliation, be actively involved in the catechesis and other ministries of the parish. “The Church is a family of families, constantly enriched by the lives of all those Domestic Churches” (Amoris Laetitia, 87).
8. Family Saint: Choose a saint as a patron of the family. Read and learn about that saint from books and the internet. Let the family imitate him/her in some of his/her words and deeds. Place an image/statue of that saint in the sacred space. Make him/her the protector/ patron of your family. Let the family be united in prayer with that saint during various moments of their lives. “Some saints, before dying, consoled their loved ones by promising them that they would be near to help them. Saint Therese of Lisieux wished to continue doing good from heaven (Amoris Laetitia, 257).”
9. Charitable Family: Charity begins at home and extends to the neighbourhood. Invite the poor to have a meal together with your family (at least during the World Day of the Poor, which falls on the Sunday before the solemnity of Christ the King). Set aside a share of your meal/resources for the poor at least once a week. Teach children not to waste food. Pope Francis reminds us that wasting food is equal to stealing from the table of the poor. “The family is thus an agent of pastoral activity through its explicit proclamation of the Gospel and its legacy of varied forms of witness, namely solidarity with the poor, openness to a diversity of people, the protection of creation, moral and material solidarity with other families, including those most in need, commitment to the promotion of the common good and the transformation of unjust social structures, beginning in the territory in which the family lives, through the practice of the corporal and spiritual works of mercy (Amoris Laetitia 290).”
10. Family Faith Traditions: Have specific family faith traditions. Go on a pilgrimage together once a year to visit a shrine near or far, in order to pray. Have specific prayer/gesture for Grace before & after meals. Initiate family members to wearing or carrying sacred images/articles. Introduce the reading of the Bible, the Compendium of Catechism of the Catholic Church/Youcat daily during the family prayer. Parents need to prepare a list of small faith traditions to teach the children. “The family is called to join in daily prayer, to read the Word of God and to share in Eucharistic communion, and thus to grow in love and become ever more fully a temple in which the Spirit dwells” (Amoris Laetitia, 29).
Prayer to the Holy Family by the family (To be said during the family prayer)
Jesus, Mary and Joseph, in you we contemplate the splendour of true love; to you we turn with trust.
Holy Family of Nazareth, grant that our families too may be places of communion and prayer,
authentic schools of the Gospel and small domestic churches.
Holy Family of Nazareth, may families never again experience violence, rejection and division; may all who have been hurt or scandalized find ready comfort and healing.
Holy Family of Nazareth, make us once more mindful of the sacredness and inviolability of the family, and its beauty in God’s plan. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, graciously hear our prayer. Amen. (Amoris Laetitia, 225)