By Fr. Chris Vimalraj Hiruthya –
A simple definition of the word ‘vocation’ is its literal meaning a ‘call’. For example, the call to married life, consecrated life and ordained priesthood. What is your calling?
In this article, our focus is on priesthood. The journey of priestly formation begins with the discernment of this call. The Congregation for Clergy in its document The Gift of Priestly Vocation says that God has placed in the hearts of some men the desire to become priests. Is this what God really wants from you? How does one make that discernment? From my own experience, I can say that I felt a profound and inexplicable strong desire to serve as a priest. I prayed about it, sought advice from a priest and discerned that priesthood was my calling in the presence of God through prayer.
It is not unusual that one experiences doubt and anxiety during the discernment process. In the Bible, we see a number of such examples. God’s call to Moses came while Moses was at work. A burring bush in an arid desert is nothing exceptional, but Moses was intrigued by this particular burning bush. When God called out to Moses and introduced himself, Moses hid his face for he was afraid to look at God. God asked Moses to go to Pharaoh, speak to him and liberate the Israelites from their bondage in Egypt. Moses’ immediate response is, “Who am I?” to go to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt. Moses’ doubt and anxiety evoked one of the most beautiful and reassuring words we hear in the Bible from God: “I will be with you”. (Exodus 3: 6-12). Moses’ doubt and anxiety expressed in his words, “Who am I?” is met with God’s assurance, “I am who I am” and “I will be with you always”. Moses recognised his calling in God’s presence; despite his fears and anxieties.
Chapter six of the prophet Isaiah records a vivid and powerful account of the call and commission of Isaiah as a prophet. After the death of King Uzziah (739 BC), an extremely solid ruler and administrator, the kingdom of Judah was in a crisis. (2 Chronicles 26:1-15). Jotham, the new king, was young and inexperienced. The neighbouring nations were threatening to wage war. The kingdom of Judah was also undergoing moral decline and decay. It was during this national crisis that the Word of God comes to Prophet Isaiah. Isaiah had a vision of God sitting on a throne; he is overcome by fear and anxiety. He cries, “Woe to me! I am ruined for I am a man of unclean lips”. After being purified God asks Isaiah, “Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?” Isaiah replies, “Here am I. Send me!” Isaiah too recognised his call in the presence of God.
Moses responded with ‘here I am’ to the call from the burning bush, and Isaiah replied with ‘here am I’ to the voice of the Lord. These are statements of availability not location. Both these prophets discerned their call and expressed their availability for God’s mission. In the Bible God is always in search of ministers to serve the needs of his people. In the New Testament, we hear Jesus saying, “They are like sheep without a shepherd”.
The example par excellence is undoubtedly the call of our dear Mother Mary. When the angel Gabriel appeared to her and greeted her, “Hail full of grace, the Lord is with thee!” Mary having heard the greeting did not speak, for she was greatly troubled at the angel’s words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. The angel Gabriel consoled her, “Do not be afraid Mary, you have found favour with God”. The angel Gabriel continues with the request from God asking Mary to be the Mother of God. Mary is filled with doubt, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?” Angel Gabriel reassures her of God’s providence, “The power of the Holy Spirit will come upon you. For nothing is impossible with God”.
Have you ever considered priesthood as your calling? Have you ever nurtured such an ideal? Are you open to discerning you vocation to ministerial priesthood? The life of a priest is a commitment to love in a certain way. Priestly life is to live our faith more deeply and follow Christ more closely. God is looking for ministers to serve his people. Do you feel doubt or anxiety as you read these lines? Do you sense fear or an impulse to serve God? How will you know if this is for you? Like the prophets and Mary you too can make a discernment in God’s presence.
Pope Saint John Paul II has excellent advice to those who want to make this discernment:
“You wish to become priests, or at least you wish to discover if you are really called. To recognise if this is God’s desire for your life, love him with all your soul and all of your heart in such a way that this love becomes the standard and motive of all your actions. From this moment on, live the Eucharist fully; be persons for whom the Holy Mass, Communion, and Eucharistic adoration are the centre and summit of their whole life. Offer Christ your heart in meditation and personal prayer so that he truly does become the foundation of your life.” Pope St. John Paul II
The feast day of St. John Maria Vianney last Friday reminds us of how he gave of himself tirelessly as a priest so as to be available to the people, compromising his health and basic need for rest and food. This is an imitation of Christ who gave himself so that we might be saved.
St. Ignatius of Loyola captures the heart and attitude of a priest in his prayer which renounces everything to God’s will, “Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will, All I have and call my own. You have given all to me. To you, Lord, I return it. Everything is yours; do with it what you will. Give me only your love and your grace, that is enough for me.”