In today’s session on ‘Good and Effective Parenting’ organised by Resurrection Church Parents’ Collective, Mr. Sunil Mahajan of Pathfinder exhorted parents to try and fill up Children’s Love Tank by means of hugs, kisses, appreciation, playing with them, affection, attention, interaction and lending an ear, among other things.
Mr. Mahajan walked us through the PRIDE methods of inculcating self-confidence, an essential ingredient for all aspects of a child’s healthy development and a key ingredient for school success. He demonstrated h
ow one can help a child develop the self-confidence they need for future success.
Children who are confident are eager to learn new skills and face new challenges. They also expect adults to be helpful and supportive of their efforts. Self-confidence is also crucial for getting along with others and working out the many social challenges—
such as sharing, competition, and making friends
—that children face in school settings. Self-confident children see that other people like them and expect relationships to be satisfying and fun.
Mr. Mahajan invoked Isaiah 46: 3-4 where he related God love for his children.
Listen to me, you descendants of Jacob, all the remnant of the people of Israel, you whom I have upheld since your birth, and have carried since you were born.
Even to your old age and grey hairs. I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
The first three years of a child is very crucial. How does self-confidence develop? Babies are born with no real sense of themselv
es as separate and distinct beings. They learn who they are primarily through their interactions. He gave an example of how a newborn cries and is comforted by her parent. This baby is learning that she is loved, important, and worthy of soothing.
Play is how children learn about themselves, other people, and world around them. Through play, children also learn how to solve problems and develop confidence
Help your child work through problems, but don’t always solve them for them.- Feeling useful and needed makes children feel important and builds confidence. Jobs should be age-appropriate.
- Children learn by doing. Break down difficult tasks into manageable steps to help him feel in control, confident, and safe. For example, if he is trying to learn to tie his shoe lace.
- Many parents try to help children feel confident by praising them. But encouragement is actually more effective than praise in building children’s confidence. However, overusing praise can actually lower children’s self-esteem and make them more competitive and less cooperative, Mr Mahajan said.
Pride Skills offered ways for improving parent-child relationship by way of scheduling 10-15 minutes of ‘special time’ each day to play with child is precious. The interaction is essential to building a healthy relationship. This is given everyday whether the child has behaved well or badly and in never taken away as a punishment. Special time should include a joint activity as well, Mr. Mahajan added.
The session was interactive, lively and activity based.