By Subhasis Chattopadhyay –
The cry of the poor resounds the most in my sanitised study where I carry on typing on my laptop.
When I waste food in a fancy restaurant, I have to be a man and suppress my tears at the orphan who looks through the glass at my wasted food.
When I flaunt contacts and revel in the joy of knowing intellectuals and the powerful of this world, the wealthy of this world; I know I am far from any God that be. I am ashamed.
When I forget to be kind to my old parents and am grumpy in the mornings, I know I am unworthy of the spiritual life.
When I am rigid and inflexible in judging others, I know I bring death to my soul.
When I hate, I know I am willingly burning myself.
When I hatch revenge, I know it will all come back to me another time.
When I demean others, ridicule them and mock them; I know I will be demeaned, ridiculed and mocked. I enjoy humiliating those weaker than I.
Then I see a new day dawning and know it brings God’s ḥesed. As the philosopher Jean-Luc Nancy recently said: “What presents itself as a day is light…“day” may be related to the Sanskrit root dah, “to burn”. The Latin dies is related to yet another semantic field (a bright light that shines) and in the form divus, the word assumes a divine dimension.” I know I have erred by not trusting in the fecund forgiveness of the God who called me into existence. I know that this world is burning with the love of and for God. Nothing but love endures.
Is it possible that I did not understand that God never condemned me in the first place? It is I who turned a deaf ear to the cries of the poor, of the waif on the street, it is I who glory in the inglorious wealth of others reducing wealthy people to my mercenary standards. Do I associate with the wealthy for my commodity-fetish? Maybe I am trapped in hate of who I have become and thus put others down? The Christian God or the Hindu God has little to do with my doings.
Does it not sound I am too much “I”?
Pray for me, my readers.
Subhasis Chattopadhyay teaches English at Narasinha Dutt College affiliated to the University of Calcutta, PG & UG Department of English. He is a book reviewer and tweets @bookbewitched.
Very important not not lose ourselves in what we achieve.It is also necessary to help others.