Fr. J. Johnson OFM Cap. –
The Second Vatican Council’s universal call to holiness emphasizes that all baptized Christians, regardless of their state in life, are called to strive for holiness and sainthood. This means that marriage, priesthood, religious life, and single life are all equal and valuable paths to achieving holiness.
Marriage, in particular, is a sacrament and a vocation that requires a deep commitment to love, serve, and support one another, raising children in the faith, and building a Christian home. It’s a beautiful and challenging vocation that requires sacrifice, forgiveness, and self-giving, just like priesthood and religious life.
The Council’s emphasis on the universal call to holiness highlights the importance of recognizing the inherent value and dignity of every vocation, and encouraging all Christians to embrace their unique calling and live it out with faith, hope, and charity.
Marriage is a sacred union ordained by God, where husband and wife become one flesh, working together towards their salvation. God brings them together for a purpose that aligns with His divine plan, and as a family, they strive to fulfill His will. In this union, they surrender their individual wills to embrace God’s will, recognizing that their marriage is a covenant not just between themselves, but also with God. Through their love, commitment, and mutual support, they reflect God’s love and become a witness to His glory. May their marriage be a testament to God’s faithfulness and grace.
In the beginning, God created Adam and tasked him with naming the creatures, but none were found to be a suitable partner or equal. Recognizing Adam’s need for a companion, God created Eve, who was not only physically but also socially, emotionally, and intellectually equal to Adam. This creation mirrored the very nature of God, who is a community of persons – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit – united in love and harmony. By creating humans in His own image and likeness, God intended for them to experience the joy of communion and relationship, just as He does within the Trinity. Therefore, it was not good for Adam to be alone, and so God created Eve to complete and complement him, demonstrating the beauty of unity and partnership in marriage.
The Bible acknowledges the beauty and goodness of sexuality within the context of marriage. The Song of Songs, also known as the Song of Solomon, is a poetic book that celebrates the love and intimacy between two spouses, using sensual and passionate language to describe their relationship.
The Bible teaches that couples become “one flesh” (Genesis 2:24, Ephesians 5:31), signifying a deep physical, emotional, and spiritual union. Sexuality is a natural and holy part of this union, reflecting God’s passionate love for humanity.
By embracing their sexuality within the boundaries of marriage, couples can experience a deeper connection with each other and with God, fostering a more intimate and loving relationship.
Moses permitted divorce due to the hardness of people’s hearts (Deuteronomy 24:1-4, Matthew 19:8). However, Jesus taught that marriage is a lifelong union, and that couples should not separate or divorce (Matthew 19:4-6, Mark 10:6-12).
Jesus emphasized that marriage is a sacred bond between two people, and that God has joined them together. He taught that humans should not separate what God has joined (Matthew 19:6). This teaching highlights the importance of commitment, forgiveness, and reconciliation in marriage, rather than resorting to divorce.
It’s worth noting that while Jesus did not permit divorce, he also taught about mercy, compassion, and love. In cases of abuse, abandonment, or other extreme circumstances, the church and Christian communities have often provided guidance and support for couples, recognizing that complex situations require wise and loving discernment.
When couples commit to each other in marriage, they should do so with the intention of fulfilling their vows for a lifetime, just as God’s love and commitment to us are unwavering and unchanging.
In the Bible, God’s faithfulness and steadfastness are often described as unchanging and eternal (Numbers 23:19, Psalm 100:5, James 1:17). God’s “yes” is always “yes,” and His promises are irrevocable (2 Corinthians 1:20).
Similarly, when couples say “yes” to each other in marriage, they should mean it with all their heart, intending to stand by their commitment through all of life’s joys and challenges. By doing so, they reflect the steadfast and unwavering love of God, and build a strong foundation for their marriage.
In the Catholic Church, when a marriage is annulled (also known as a declaration of nullity), it means that the sacramental marriage was deemed invalid from the beginning, due to a lack of certain essential elements or circumstances.
This doesn’t mean that the couple didn’t have a legal marriage or that they didn’t have a real relationship. Rather, it means that the sacramental bond of marriage, as understood by the Church, was not present.
In other words, the Church is saying that the marriage, as it was celebrated, did not meet the necessary conditions for a valid sacramental marriage. This can be due to various reasons such as lack of consent, lack of freedom, lack of canonical form, or other impediments.
When a marriage is annulled, it’s not a statement about the couple’s love or commitment to each other, but rather a recognition that the sacramental marriage, as intended by God and understood by the Church, was not realized in that particular union.
Indissolubility of marriage is a Catholic doctrine that holds that a valid, sacramental marriage is permanent and cannot be dissolved by any human power. This means that once a couple has entered into a valid marriage, they are bound together for life, and no human authority can sever that bond.
This doctrine is based on Jesus’ teaching in the New Testament, particularly in Matthew 19:6, where He says, “What God has joined together, no human being must separate.” The Catholic Church has consistently taught and upheld this doctrine throughout its history, emphasizing the sacred and permanent nature of marriage.
In practice, this means that the Church does not recognize divorce and remarriage, except in very specific circumstances, such as when a marriage is declared null through the annulment process. Even in cases of separation or divorce, the Church still considers the couple to be married in the eyes of God, and they are not free to remarry unless the marriage is declared null or one of the spouses dies.
The indissolubility of marriage is indeed rooted in human instincts and the natural dynamics of love and commitment.
When two people fall in love, they often express their devotion with phrases like “I love you forever” or “You’re the center of my life.” This language reflects a deep desire for permanence and unity, which is a fundamental aspect of human nature.
The indissolubility of marriage acknowledges and honors this natural inclination, recognizing that the love and commitment between two people is meant to be a lifelong bond. By embracing this doctrine, couples can build a strong foundation for their relationship, trusting that their love will endure through all of life’s joys and challenges.
It highlights the beauty of how human instincts and emotions align with the teachings of the Church, reflecting the wisdom and wonder of God’s plan for marriage and human love.
We can compare the dynamics of marriage with God’s faithfulness and humanity’s unfaithfulness.
Just as God remains faithful to us despite our unfaithfulness, a faithful spouse can choose to remain committed to their marriage vows, even when their partner is unwilling to work towards a lifelong union. This echoes God’s steadfast love and devotion to us, despite our shortcomings.
And just as Jesus reconciled us with the Father, bridging the gap caused by our sin and separation, a faithful spouse can extend love, forgiveness, and grace to their unfaithful partner, seeking reconciliation and healing in the marriage.
It highlights the beauty of God’s design for marriage, where two imperfect individuals can come together, seeking to fulfill His purpose, and in the process, reflect His love, forgiveness, and redemption. By embracing this mindset, couples can work towards building a stronger, more resilient marriage, grounded in God’s faithfulness and love.
Fr. J. Johnson OFM Cap. belongs to the Amala Annai Capuchin province in TamilNadu, India.